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Dave Griffin On Running
The Carroll County Times – Sunday, November 8, 2009
These words didn’t come easily, but reluctantly, as if they didn’t want to be heard. The thoughts and feelings formed a bottleneck, refusing to flow.
To start with, this was a week I had been dreading at work. I had to deliver difficult news and watch the emotional aftermath. Leadership has its drawbacks and leaves you standing alone sometimes.
As the week went on, I learned that several friends were dealing with loss. In one case, death had come just in time, almost mercifully. In another case it came far too swiftly, taking us by surprise. Afterwards, regardless of the details, loved ones grieved and wrestled with the unthinkable challenge of moving forward.
Others close to me were simply struggling with life itself, something we all do from time to time, but the abundance of sadness was unusual, as if sorrow was suddenly contagious.
Mixed in was the constant din of bad news and propaganda, media driven noise that has led me to be far more cynical than I ever wanted to be. And, it was all just too much. So, I turned to the stone foundation that has always kept me standing before.
There was no physical purpose for the run; I wasn’t looking for a workout. So, as the stiffness lingered longer than usual, I simply ignored it. I didn’t have the energy to run faster anyway.
I followed my normal route, not even thinking about where I was going. In fact, thought was absent; I was unconsciously going through the run, until movement on the trail ahead caught my attention. It was a young buck, his antlers just forming behind the ears that hadn’t heard me approaching. He was slowly moving toward a wide stream, and I stopped so he wouldn’t notice me.
He took a drink as a breeze freed some yellow leaves that danced to the ground around him. Then, I was suddenly aware of the whole striking scene, the colors, the tranquility, and him standing in the middle, a body of growing strength. I didn’t want to disturb it, didn’t want the picture to change, so I turned around and headed back the other way.
Sometimes I get stuck in a figurative place and can’t find my way out, until running leads me in a better direction. Whenever life turns ugly, running presents something beautiful. Whenever I feel weak, it gives me strength. I really don’t know what I’ve done to deserve such a gift, but I’ll accept it with gratitude.
When my run was over, nothing had changed, with the exception of my frame of mind, but that was enough to remove the bottleneck of thoughts and feelings and allow these words to form. Sometimes, trying to control life is a futile task, but I’m determined not to let it control me. And, when it begins to take hold, I know exactly what to do.
Dave Griffin
Dave Griffin is the Times’ running writer. His column appears every other Sunday. Reach him at dpgflyingfeet@aol.com or join the Facebook group, Dave Griffin On Running.